What is Love

What is it really

Its easy - its being with the person that you would like to be with always.

At an young age, its not easy knowing that. you just think oh my god, i wanna speak to her always and keep speaking.

go home and call and speak
go school and speak during breaks
socialize during family gatherings and speak.

or

just exist
just be there
just come to work everyday
just go to church everyday
be present
that would be good

whats the point of love if you are not going to say that you love them - so you say - but if you say, they need not necessarily agree and we should be okay with that.
its karma, what we dont want from others, others dont want that from us.

so basically life is a bitch!!!

you just marry your well wishers want to see you happy with your kids, with their future grandkids!!!phew.....


No point getting angry with anyone because everything is because of you and you alone. so its easy to think that we were fucking dumb when we were young and be happy now since we are smart.
there is no point thinking if i was smart i would have got her, because you would have missed other things like pure love and friendship and innocence.
so let it go. Because eventually nothing is going to stay unless it wants to.

Reincarnation./music project

Its not good to be down. Time to make most of what you got. This is my idea that I am noting down so that I can collaborate with ppl who are into music. Definitly I am part of the project as I am going to be singing and playing the guitar :) My lead will be Mr. Boutilier The song that I would like to sing is pulli ki jaana with didi Khaled tunes....I am not going to be singing with the lyrics most of them as I cant remember that much in my hear :( We could have a paper in front of us I suppose, lets see that how goes.... I would like to add a female voice......which one....get in touch with your satsang team and see what you can do next to get someone who is professional to record our stuff and charge us.... i would love to get someone to beat the drums....i know one dude in satsang....hope he is alive, am i going to do this...i would love to but work will pull me towards the Zombie life.... lets fight it out me , mr boutilier right now , video record guy professional, female voice, drums guy.....that makes 5.... i would be the last person to sing ...lets see that this goes apparently the song is in the key of E major, i thought it was D

this was a dream that i need to think about and its weird too. I see my niece's husband at a particular distance on a isolated street in india and we take a smoke but I dont talk to him. I have never actually talked to him cause i did not feel like. and then I see this guy from Canada who is not a friend of mine but he is my FB friend and I just say a hi and have small talk ignoring the other guy and then i wake up.....one of the worst dreams that i have had, atleast weird....... is this because i cleaned up the storage room yesterday at 1701 and became tired after 1hr of cleanup work..... what is the point of that dream and y did it occur.

my dreams this happened way back when I was around 2nd or 3rd grade. My family was for reason in a forest This forest had the biggest rock in the world that could crust atleast 20 of them if it falls down and could kill another 50 if it starts rolling forward. Anways my niece was right under the rock and it was at that point that the rock fell down - I ran at 1000 kmph and pushed her and got crushed Then my mom woke me up asking what happened.....I told her my niece died.....

29th of july

Hey, me still wainting for this srreejit fella to come out of the bathroom with my shift at 10....

Anyways the days are running are crazy.......this week has been y-cording and job shadowing with Mark.

Me failing in the final assessment and required to take it again in 3 weeks with a week gone already.

21st of july

pretty much the same routine over the past few days , tomorow is an assessment for the job. if successful , no retraining....i dont want to be retrained....

Got the CKDU portable recorder for the 'not yet planned interview with whom ???" i dont know.....:)

k k , nothingg much

love my family ,friends :(

july 16th....

its july 16th , this week was a dry fast week where we were introduced to SMART other softwares like sync , classroom suite etc.

not a special week at all...:(

11th july

10th - one of the lazy sundays spent on the waterfront having coffee and coconut shrimps along with guitar....

and on monday , we covered in detail the software section of the notebook software.

booked ticket for the harry potter finale.....never been this excited and sad thinking about dumbledore death , really sad......:(

thats it for the day.... i guess the next day has began though , shit , i have to sleep

9th july 2011

Rajkapoor intro with the film dulha dulhan.

Mukesh died on my bday.

Good breakfast with sree nag....

So far.....:)

8th july , 2011

Today , the last day of the first week at Blue ocean and so relieved
today , we went through the customer services with respect to the type of calls and support that we do at SMART.
We also set up our SMART email address and went through pivotal , a very important url used at BLUE OCEAN.


So lets see If I can remember the entire first week
1.initial set up
2.product intro
3.competitors and their race in the same market , not sure....:)
4.custom solution and smart website
5.customer service

july 7th - 2011

today , we covered the complete list of competitors for SMART. Apart from Promethean , nothing stands in my mind.
Also , we had a look at the custom solutions that SMART provides and had a conference video call along with a presentation about custom solutions and what they offer.

Then bhajan time ......

july 6th - 2011

Day 1 - Mondaya - july 4.....blueocean first day , presentation about the company
Day 2 - overview of smart products
Day 3 - - Analysis of smart website including each link / / Evening show with Rosanne Cash, johnny cash daughter and Old man leudake....and google plus initial inaugration with new room mate , srijith.
6th july

symphony nova scotia

SNS.
GILBERT AND SULLIVAN.
THE NUT-CRACKER SHOW.
THE PHANTOM OF OPERA.
THE CHEBUCTO SYMPHONY.
The Rankin family
David Myles
The Barra Mcneil and many more.........

This has been many of the few events in the Dalhousie University - Rebecca Cohn Audithorium which has been unforgettable.

Halifax is awesome.

flying high

well again , the reason y i am blogging now is because of moments......

to start with , let me the justin thanksgiving was good because i made an appearance at a place where only canadians were presetn and getting used to a place like that for an indian is not an easy job.............whewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
but it was good because i was inspired again by a guy playing the guitar so superbly
anyways , the 2nd reason is that i had a good time in the evening , smoked a joint with mara , was shocked when she actually asked me what i was doing at 5.
obviously i would say nothing really great and so had a good time smoking up and flying high with her , she used a lot of terms which i did not understand but who cares , the point was to carry on which i had learnt over a period of months.
she was so different and that was good , she had not much of stress today at her work
and she left saying she enjoyed the day with a person like me , thats good cos i know i am little boring person............
and then i have to mention this other lady whom i dont need to mention............:)is that an oxymoron ???7Anyways , manju and madhu will be preparing for the concert for the world event thing for some type of cancer..........
great , really good to know ...............manju has been growing up with respect to hunger for music.
i am actually feeling good though i am not in india.

Moments........

There's a famous saying that says...."In the end, it's not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away "
Well , over the past 1 week , there has been moments that took my breath away.....
The first one has to be the girl whom I asked for a date.She looked like a lady from Italy who knows litte english.And I use litte because when I said she was awesome , there was some sort of confusion on her face.However , there was this amazing smile which blew me away by 500metres.
So we had some icecream , ((We referring to my collegemates , who are guys :())and I started playing guitar for some time.Then I went back in and asked the girl for a date.Wow , the same smile saying , " Thank you , but I have a boyfriend , Thankx " just blew me away but this time away from the place.
Well anyways theres nothing to speak about this and thats the reason I am blogging.
Atleast it made my day a little better.
The second has to be AMARA whom I have been thinking about too much for no reason , After all the only conversation that I have is when she does the cashing at the Stores.
Anyways , the first time , I saw her , I could see her struggling to get the bike chain unlocked.My subconscious mind did tell me to go and check out what the issue was.And in about 15 seconds , she unlocked the chain.
Well , right now , as I am typing this , I see that this is not actually one of the moments , however , It made me smile cos she has this contagious smile.
And the second time , I see her , She does not remember me.How common is this happening for me , God , I need to focus on how to maintain relationships of whatever kind it can be.
Then I had to make her remember and that was bad , though , at that time , I felt good.
I guess I have to go now , Unofficially , I have to start working on this abstract which is to be submitted on the last date of this month.
Hope I keep blogging.....:)

August 2nd 2010

Well , it was just another day , to put it in a high low point , the high point was that I made about 11 dosas.I had to mix about 250 gm of rice flour with 1/4th cup of urad flour and then i had to make a batter out of it. Then in the morning , I practised little guitar , like a song from john denver - leaving on a jetplane which had chords g , c and d.
Then practised the g and the e major scale which had the g , c , d chord and e , a and b7 chord respectively
then practise the open g and d chords.
Well , I never thought I would be able to play the guitar and now after nearly 2 weeks of buying guitar , I think I have moved forward.
The low point would be definitely the rejection you know what i mean . Like the point that I am still single has started to trouble me so much , well theres this girl whom had similar interest in music and movies that i thought will be a easy woman to live with , I guess the idea for her was not good.

today the 2nd of august , hmmmmmmmmm nothing much

i want to be bad but how...........how is it some ppl are bad so easily .....good ppl are fit for nothing , guess thats y i am in canada sucking alone when my entire life and family and friends are there....
i have become numb seeing ppl and myself , i hve been in a cocoon for such a long time that i dont realise how ppl are ,
i have started to observe more , speak less ...........so bored.......dont know wheres my life going
i dont want to end up and die alone without a girl by my side , i need to find my girl...........

Feb 21st

Today is an important day
1.Manju's first music concert day where she will be performing in a group , they would be performing for about 90mins.
2.Love your pet day.(everyday you got to love your pet , but today its a etc special day)

C,est la vie

Tous les matins, c'est la meme corrida
Lever la tete, ouvrir les bras
Tous les matins, c'est le meme numro
Trouver l'amour, chercher les mots
Je suis coinc comme un vad
Faut marcher, ne jamais s'arreter
Je suis pig, comme un condamn
A marcher, ne jamais se retourner
C'est la vie, la vie c'est du vent
Qui nous souffle les reves d'enfant
C'est la nuit qui descend,
C'est jamais comme avant
Il ne faut plus faire semblant, attends
C'est la vie, la vie qui le veut
Qui nous blesse, le cur et les yeux
C'est la nuit qui retombe
Comme la pluie et les bombes
Il ne faut plus faire semblant, attends
Tous les matins c'est le meme cinma
Tendre les mains, croiser les doigts
Tous les matins, c'est la meme comdie
Chercher quelqu'un, trouver celle qui
Je suis pig comme un naufrag
Faut marcher, ne jamais s'arreter
Je suis coinc, comme un rvolt
A marcher, jamais se retourner
C'est la vie, la vie c'est du vent
Qui nous souffle les reves d'enfant
C'est la nuit qui descend,
C'est jamais comme avant
Il ne faut plus faire semblant, attends
C'est la vie, la vie qui le veut
Qui nous blesse, le cur et les yeux
C'est la nuit qui retombe
Comme la pluie et les bombes
Il ne faut plus faire semblant, attends

kangna

Addiyan ton ki paiyan jhanjara laung mare lishkare
Kagna tera ni , sanu kare ishaareaaaaaaa
Kagne de vitch lage naag sat rang ni
Kale kale aashiqan to dilhe mange ni
Apne esee kagne nu saam ke rakh mutiyaare
Kagna tera ni sanu kare ishaare
Goriyan baava de ute tere bara jhachda
Tu eh sikaundiye nu eh sanu dasda
Kagna tera saach bolda husan diye sarkaare
Kagna tera ni sanu kare ishaare -2
Kagne tere ne hun jaadu jiya paaliya
Bange ne Rekeshhhh nu ta pich ne laaliya
Teri aas te betha hun na kaliyan vakt guzaare
Kagna tera ni sanu kare ishaare